Video Category: Mindset

Why The Same Things Keep Happening

Why The Same Things Keep Happening

Have you noticed in life that sometimes with something that's unwanted, something that doesn't work for you and it just keeps showing up, again, and again, and again in a bigger and bigger way. And it's frustrating, it is so frustrating. Because you just don't understand why. One thing that I have come so apparent to over the last six months is this. And I see it within myself and see it within my friends. I have friends saying: "I always attract the same type of partner!" And they just can't get out of that. Or "I always have the same problem with my contractors," you know whatever it is. like there is something that just keeps heading up against  and it just won't stop.
One thing that has come into my space and then I have started to watch and study and once I did I saw it in every single person development program I've ever done. I saw it in every single religion I've ever studied. And that is this concept. It's like concept that in life we're giving things to overcome. We're getting challenges. And these challenges will show up like little pepple that maybe, you know, bounced off your head, and ,you know, like: "What was that?" A minute becomes a rock and then becomes a boulder and then an asteroid that destroys your house. Now, that's a little dramatic, but really, it can feel like that like your whole world is destroyed. The one thing that I've started doing is I started to look at when I come up against something, when something enters my space that is unwanted. I look at has this happened before? What does this remind me of? And the biggest one that was the "aha!" moment for me was when I was going through my Executive MBA program, and there was this guy within the program that just ruined my entire experience of MBA, and It was my fault, and I allowed him to ruin it but I realized, because I was like: "What was that?" because it was seriously not an asteroid that destroyed my house, but it was pretty damn close and out of nowhere for no reason at all, you know, I just could not ___ them: why this happened? And what happened is a story  for my TED Talk one day. And the point I'm getting at is that when I stepped back and look at it I was like "What is familiar about these?" And I was like: "It's the relationship" It is personality conflict, it is how this person showing up and how I'm showing up and then the bounce back. And I traced it all the way back to my relationship with my dad. Now, this wasn't a 'daddy' issue, what it was was a personality issue, and it wasn't an issue it's just how I  showed up and how I bounced off the personality type of this, and I saw what had happened my entire life until  I got to a point where it was going to destroy me. You know, and, yes, that's been a little bit dramatic, but I mean, it was not a good situation and the point being is that this happens to all of us. So what I'm going to challenge you with and that I've been challenging myself with is that when something comes up in your space that's unwanted is to look at it and say what does this remind me of? where have I seen this before? because there's something to transform, and that transformation that hurdle to get over started off as like a little brick that you've stepped over. And that brick that had maybe five high and then it got to hurdle and then it turned into a wall and then there was a brick wall that, there is no way breaking through it and it got your attention. So these things that we're meant to break through, these things were meant to transform, they will show up, and they will continue to show up. It's kind like a little one that saying: "Did you hear me?" Or you didn't... Let me try again. Did you hear me now?or you still didn't? Let me try again... And honestly I don't know about you, but I don't want those big things. So if I can may have those transformations and learn those things  at the universe, God, whatever it is, putting in front of me to overcome. If I can get through those faster I'm hell a lot happier. And so that's what I've been doing and that's what I'm challenging you to do. Is when you head up against something that is unwanted, take a moment and look at what it is and what it is  within that for you and your world to transform.

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Business Owner Success – Expansion of Self – Bad with the Good

Business Owner Success – Expansion of Self – Bad with the Good

Video Transcript

Have you noticed in life there is kind of like a safe zone, there's just like a middle zone where it's socially acceptable, you know, you're not making anyone feel bad, you're not making anyone feel stupid like there's a space that, I know, I have felt my whole life that I need to be in. You know, kind of finding that middle ground taking my positives and my negatives and finding that middle ground. One of the things I have seen in people who highly succeed in life, and working with entrepreneurs for over 20 years, what I've noticed is the ones who really succeed are the ones who don't force themselves in this grey zone. We have a polarity to us: we have good thoughts, we have bad thoughts, we have strength, we have weaknesses, and a lot of times what I see is entrepreneurs  especially will try to force those bad parts, those weaknesses the things they don't  like as far away as they can and then try to hold on and  grab on to the pieces that are good. Where the power lies and where  I've seen the power expand is when we take on the polarity of ourselves. This is a space where we say: "I am so brilliant! And I'm good at what I do! And I'm also learning". This is the space where you say: "I want to shine my light  and I'm going to be bright!", even though it may make people feel  insecure about themselves. Knowing that their are these extremes that actually make up who you are and trying to dim them it dims your greatness. This was something that I've worked on for years and I've gone through so many different person developments, meditations, and levels of self, to really open up my shine because I've always been afraid that  I would blind people. When I really showed who I was I  felt like people just pulled away so it was kind of like "oh no, I can't do that" and being in the... just being with self and in that polarity knowing that I am brilliant, I am really good at what I  do with businesses, I'm also dyslexic with a speech impediment and knowing that I'm dyslexic and knowing I have a speech impediment has really made me pull in my brilliance for so long. Until I just accepted that those were two different sides of me. What would it be like in life to be okay with being loved and being hated at the same time. We live in a world where we want people to love us but we're afraid of them leaving us.
What if you could have both?
I really don't think this world  is a this or that type of space. It is this and that, you can really have it all. For me, I can be a business  owner and I can be a mother. I can be a wife and at the  same time being a friend. You know, there is a balance and an openness  and the expansion of self that happens when you look at the polarities and instead of making one good and one  bad, you embraced them all and when you take on that space in the world, you were able to really shine and glow and expand in the world. My call today is to give yourself permission to embrace the sides of yourself that you maybe don't like or are not your favorite and know that this is part of the polarity of who you are. Can you give yourself the permission and allow yourself to coexist within all the spaces that make you - You. Because if you do, the world will open up and there's so much freedom, so much self expression so much love and joy  for self and others then you can ever imagine.

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“Sometimes you have to let someone drown,” said the Lifeguard

“Sometimes you have to let someone drown,” said the Lifeguard

Video Transcript

Hey, good morning! So it's so weird for me to say good morning, um, because it is morning for me, but who knows if it's morning when you read this, so happy day I guess. So this morning I was doing my normal, like get up, get ready. I always listen to something in the morning to kind of set the tone for my day and I let whatever needs to be in the universe just kind of show up to me. Well, today I was really attracted to this one story, and it's so apparent to me that it's a story that is for me to share, and I'm reminding you. I told you to get ready for school. I should say that again, Jacoby, get ready for school. Our smart houses are a totally different thing to talk about today than usual. Yes, we'll be getting ready for school, but today is a snow day, so no school. But getting back to my story, thank you. Alexa. So the story is about this young lifeguard. This young lifeguard loved people. He loved the ocean. He loved the environment of the beach with its fun and joy. So he goes and is so excited for his first day of being a lifeguard. He gets his training. He figures out how to do CPR. He figures out how to use the different life-saving devices. He's super stoked. To really help the younger learn, most industries pair a young with an old and an experienced with an inexperienced individual. Well, one day you know their training is almost done and the older lifeguard looks at him and says, "Do you realize one day you might have to let someone drown?" And the young lifeguard's like, "No way, there's no way I'm ever gonna let anyone drown. You know, I'm committed to people. Can I save people? I would do everything I could to save someone. The old lifeguard goes, "Son, someday you might have to let someone drown and the young lifeguard, you know, he was raised where you don't talk back to your elders, you know, so he's just kind of like, "Uh, you know, and so he's giving him this look like, "You're a crazy old man, you know, there's no way I can do that. I see a lifeguard pause and just look at him and say, "Sometimes people are floundering around so much that if you try to save them, they would knock you out and you would die. And he goes, and sometimes people are so heavy, they are so weighted, they just sink down and if you try to pull them up, if you try to make them surface, they will drown you. Sometimes people will be so frantic that they'll just climb on top of you and push you down, as you know they're trying to get up. The moral of the story is that life is based on a true story and a true conversation that this lady was sharing. The truth of the story is that the real purpose of this in life is to look at where in life you have someone, something, some project, some emotion, some limiting belief that is really dragging you down. You know, we all have come across those people in life that we can't save. You know, there are clients in life that just like it's just not worth it. You know, there are thought processes and belief systems about yourself or even about your spouse or another that if you hold on to those thoughts they will really drag you down. So today what I really want to share and for you to look at is what in life is dragging you down, pulling you down, trying to climb on top of you while you're sinking and how can you give yourself a life raft and let that go so that way you don't drown with them?

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